


Closure

by SakuraBlossomStorm



Series: Stories From the Parks Department Floor [3]
Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Angst, F/M, break-up, lonely
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-15
Updated: 2016-08-15
Packaged: 2018-08-09 00:19:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7779298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SakuraBlossomStorm/pseuds/SakuraBlossomStorm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Smallest Park project is coming to a close and Ben needs to really think about his future in Pawnee.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closure

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry about all the posts! I only ever really have inspiration like this once in a blue moon! I guarantee you next week I'll be stuck for ideas.
> 
> I hope you enjoy, this is another Ben-centric story set during The Smallest Park episode. Enjoy :)

_‘I used to have one really good reason for staying in Pawnee, but now I’m not sure what’s keeping me here…’_

There weren’t enough sleeping pills in the world to knock Ben out.

He had been laying awake for hours now; he stayed up watching TV until about 11 when he decided to go to bed but his eyes refused to grow heavy. He stayed awake listening to the sounds around him, the sudden down pour outside, the unmistakeable and slightly annoying sound of April and Andy having sex next door. The hours ticked on and still nothing, Ben wasn’t sure what he could try, he thought about some tea, but he knew that he’d be up in a few hours to pee and that wouldn’t be much good. He thought about counting sheep, but that was just a stupid myth.

Why couldn’t he sleep?? Ben cursed himself out loud and threw the covers off him, fed up he dragged himself back over to his desk. If he couldn’t sleep he might as well throw himself back into work.

His most recent project was this tiny spot of concrete in Pawnee that Leslie had planned to make Indiana’s smallest park, she had come to him for help getting the project off the ground, that smile and her passion for everything made him agree, secretly he wished he hadn’t.

Things just weren’t working out between them the way she had wanted. They had tried to be friends but that just didn’t seem to work. Their connection before had been so strong and fiery, now that they couldn’t kiss each other every time they saw each other or be intimate with one another after a long days work, the fire had long gone out.

As Ben check over the needed paper work for their meeting tomorrow with Chris, he soon realised that he couldn’t sleep because of her.

Why had he agreed to this stupid park? It was literally just the two of them on the project; they couldn’t do anything with one another. It was seriously starting to bum him out.

Every thing they have done together since they ended things has just ended in misery. The whole stupid Zorp coming to end the world thing that he had to go to started it all, Shauna Malwae-Tweep had struck up a conversation with him, God knows what they were talking about, could have been anything, he spent the conversation watching Leslie’s face crumple with anger.

Ben wouldn’t of done anything, heck he didn’t even know Shauna thought he was cute until Leslie told him, but it was infuriating that this was the first woman to show an interest in him in a while and he felt like he had a obligation to turn her down just to make Leslie happy.

She had tried to lead Shauna away from him and also stop Ben from going to the ‘End of the World’ Party that Tom was hosting. Somehow her babbling led them both to her car and she drove away taking him to some super special location that he just had to see at this very moment.

He knew this was just a ploy to stop him from leaving, but why did he get in the car?

Because those few precious moments he would get being alone with her again might just give him the closure he needed.

It didn’t work. They ended up at an abandoned gas station, which was supposedly owned by Mick Jagger. It ended up annoying Ben even more. She was just being selfish now; she refused to accept that they were over and that he might have just been moving on. He had told her that they couldn’t hang out like this anymore and left her alone at the gas station.

He didn’t sleep that night either, he remembered that part clearly, he could have gone to Tom’s party and seen Shauna again, maybe he could have taken her home with him, but he didn’t. He walked the long 45 minutes back to Andy and April’s and tried to sleep.

It must have been the early hours of the morning when he finally dozed off and then was immediately woken up with a banging, he knew exactly who it was going to be, Leslie.

Sure enough the woman herself was there, she apologized and accepted that their romantic relationship was over, and that was that.

Then things just got ridiculous, that stupid and petty fight they had at the Model UN got way out of hand, things were said, things were done. Ben wanted to hurt Leslie, the way she had hurt him that night at the gas station. He needed to find that closure to put this to bed once and for all. 

The bad thing was, he hurt Leslie and himself in the process. 

Once again they had a talk and agreed to at least try to talk to each other once a day for five minutes. It still hurt and it still sucked. Ben found himself looking forward to that short conversation every day, and once it was over he left feeling miserable, a horrible pang thudding in his heart.

This had been going on for weeks now and it was just affecting him mentally and physically, sleep was non-existent, he was stressed, losing weight due to no appetite. He needed to move on, they had tried friends, they even tried just work colleagues. Nothing was working.

Why the _hell_ did he agree to this stupid park??

He knew there would soon be a day when Leslie would move on, she would find someone new, maybe a Lawyer or a Cop… someone with authority who would sweep her off her feet and she would forget all about him, he’d be left in the dust, watching them kiss and cuddle, all of the things he should be doing with her.

That thought scared him, he didn’t want to be around her if she moved on, of course he wanted her to be happy, he wasn’t that selfish, but Lord… he just needed some space.

Ben rested his head in his hands, rubbing his temples. His emotions were running wild, he could have cried; hit something, even screamed if he wanted to.

Realising that he needed to calm down, he shoved his work to the side, got up from his desk and walked back to his bed. He didn’t sleep; he just lay there with his eyes closed, taking steady breaths.

Tomorrow he was going to talk to Chris about taking over all his Parks duties. He needed to focus on other departments to get away from this; he’d do this for a few more months and then look to going back to Indianapolis.

He knew Leslie would be mad, she’d scrunch her face up and call him names and it would sting for a day or two, but it was for the best.

This wasn’t worth the stress anymore. This was his conclusion, his closure.


End file.
